Faye Arcand

Don’t Forget–Guys Feel Insecure Too.

Insecurity is one of the most debilitating things that a person can suffer from. 

Simply defined it means a lack of confidence within yourself, your abilities, and/or appearance. 

It manifests itself through anxiety and feelings of inadequacy. It can affect all parts of your life and hold you back. 

We often hear about girls being bombarded by magazine articles and pictures of models telling them what they should strive toward, but seldom do we think about the guys. 

All too often the perfect male is portrayed as muscular, tall, chiseled features, with excess sex appeal and oozing confidence. An unrealistic portrayal unattainable by 99% of the population. This crap has done as much damage to the boys as the emaciated female models have to the girls. 

Issues like eating disorders, body dysphoria, and social anxiety strike the guys just as often. We just don’t talk about it. I want everyone to remember that the next time you’re with a group of buds and want to make fun of someone for the way they look. 

One example is height. There’s no rule out there that says a guy needs to be six feet (183 cm) tall, but there’s a social stigma for short men. Not always, I know, but it’s there and the guys feel it. What’s sad is some then develop little-big-man syndrome where they feel a need to control or be more powerful which is to overcompensate for their lack of stature. 

Be who you need to be…

Should it matter if a guy is shorter than his girlfriend? Absolutely not. 

Do guys feel insecure about this? You bet.

It’s always hoped that you can find someone who accepts you for who you are. Some physical attributes can be changed but many are genetic and need to be accepted. 

Accepting yourself is the first step. Whether you’re straight, gay, non binary, trans…whatever…there’s a place for you in this world. 

Do not accept the stereotypes and don’t try to measure up to them because it’s impossible to achieve and you’ll continue to chip away at your self esteem as you do so. 

Accept others for who they are and they’ll accept you…or so it is hoped. If they don’t—move on. 

My Auntie dream would be for each individual to find the love of their life—the acceptance and non-judgment that all deserve. 

Once you find it, hold on tight and don’t sabotage it with your insecurities. This is really important. It can be a destructive habit to constantly questionsomeones motives. If you find yourself thinking…why is this person with me they could do so much better—give yourself a swift kick in the butt and stop.

Trust that you too are worthy of being loved. 

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