Tell me your thoughts in the comments below. Did this affect you as a kid? or perhaps it’s a parenting issue you hadn’t thought of. Let me know.
~~~~~
Parents. Listen up and take this truth to heart.
The important thing is that all you can do is be yourself. The truth does eventually surface. Sometimes as a parent you want to scream and throw things at the other parent–you want to justify your anger and make sure everyone–including the kids, get IT!
They will.
Kids are smarter than we realize. They take it all in and eventually are able to sort through it in the end.
Auntie Lesson:
DON’T bad mouth your spouse to the kids. It will make them want to defend the other or resent you for keeping them from that relationship.
Don’t point out the other parent’s flaw to the kids.
That child is put in a situation where two of the most important people in his/her life are at odds.
It is not about them and it’s not fair for any parent to call names, hurl insults, or discuss intimate details with a child.
Parents: grow up and be a parent to your child. The other parent is not the enemy in the eyes of the child and that’s how you want it. That kid needs every edge they can get and you don’t want them hating or resenting the other parent. Period. They’ll see it eventually.
SideBar: I want to say that if there is abuse and/or violence involved in your home then the situation changes a bit in that you may need to involve the child through warnings and truth. If this is the case please seek help for yourself and your family. In Canada you can call or text: 1-800-799-SAFE (7223)
TTY 1.800.787.3224 and website here.
Good points here, Faye. Thanks for saying them. Interestingly, my latest essay “Storms” which I just sent out is about motherhood in the storms of life. Guess we’re having a telepathic moment!
Love you,
Nancy
Your favorite sister-in-law (right?)
Thanks Nancy…my fave sis-in-law who was once an Arcand….lol. Interesting. I look forward to reading your essay. “Storms” …great title. xoxo