Auntie Says...

Casual Sex is NOT and SHOULD NOT BE an Expectation of Dating…EVer.

Dating is a time of getting to know each other and it’s important that you get on the same page as soon as possible.

If one is expecting casual sex and the other doesn’t want that then the sooner you establish it, the better.

Believe me, it can be a turn off for some. And that doesn’t need to come through judgement so much as personal boundaries and preferences.

There should never be an expectation for casual sex though.

Simple as that.

There should also be no judgement passed. If someone is in a different place than you, that’s fine.

If someone is simply into hooking up, it’s not your job to be their mommy or tell them what is right and what’s wrong.

So long as they’re of legal age, they’re free to make choices for themselves and it has nothing to do with you.

Move on.

Remember, casual sex means different things to different people. Some thoughts:

  • a different guy/girl every night
  • it could mean sex before marriage.
  • perhaps sex with one guy for a year
  • friends with benefits
  • non-monogamous
  • sex whenever the mood strikes
  • just because you’re there…why? why not?

It means different things to different people. Define it for yourself and don’t let anyone tell you your being a stuck-up bitch or a jerk… stick to your own standards and be true to yourself.

Remember, STD’s can, and will, follow if you’re not careful. Practice safe sex. Know your partner.

And how do you feel about casual pregnancy? Don’t forget to think about that too. This is a serious, life-altering issue.

When you agree to a monogamous relationship then a commitment is formed.

If you’re just having sex with a friend for the sake of convenience one can end up developing feelings while the other doesn’t.

Again. This can be dangerous territory.

Here are a couple of other discussion about dating.

Are You Dating a Narcicisst?

Are You a Victim of Gaslighting? and More About Gaslighting.

Fresh Perspective on Your Hook Up Behavior

Blindside Break-Up and The Update

The Hook Up Scene

Auntie Lesson:

You are your own person. You’re in charge of you. Don’t ever doubt that and never forget it. If you want to go play and have casual sex the only thing I can say is take precautions and don’t get hurt.

If you’re over it and/or not into it, don’t let anyone drag you down a path you don’t want to be on.

Be aware. Be smart. If in doubt, don’t hesitate to send me a message and ask me.

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